Here’s one last shout-out to all that K-Ville wasn’t…namely, a long-running series on a real network.

A toast…to K-Ville.

k-ville, kville, daily science dose, urban ecoist, portland, oregon

It’s looking a little X-Files to me, and that could be a good thing. My secret is that I have yet to watch Lost. I know, I know, it’s great and I will love it. I even own the first two or three seasons and I have yet to watch them. Why? I don’t know. It’s like after going through my addiction to The 4400 and then reeling from it when it started sucking, rebounded right into Battlestar Galactica. I just don’t want to get hooked on another multi-season-and-still-going hour long scifi drama. I just can’t. I will someday, but not today. Maybe this winter.

Anyway, Fringe is what I am writing about today. I am not sure if Fringe will be a “K-Ville.” Does it capitalize on a tragedy? If you count something like the lack of X-Files a tragedy, then yes, but I don’t think that counts. So will it only last one season or less? Who’s to say. FOX is notorious at canceling shows that perhaps just needed a second season to find their legs and audience, but JJ Abrams is behind this one, so it must be good, right? This is the guy behind Alias (never watched it, never wanted to) and Lost (already discussed above), so you know, he’s awesome or something.

Wait. What else does the image say? “From the writers of Transformers…” That movie was terrible, I mean really, really terrible. Maybe I am not as excited as I thought I was.

We shall see. FOX is fickle. Firefly came from Joss Whedon and that did nothing to keep it on the air. I am trying to think of another example, and can only think of something like Cop Rock. Can anyone please think of anything else?

FOX, fall tv, Fringe, X-Files, Lost, Alias, BSG, Battlestar Galactica, The 4400, Firefly, Cop Rock, JJ Abrams, Joss Whedon, Transformers

Almost to the day three years later, New Orleans and the Gulf Coast are preparing to be hit by yet another hurricane, Gustav. I am not one that turns to prayer often, being an atheist, but if there is a higher being that can help mitigate another disaster, I hope that no one has to die this time around.

Sadly, three years later and New Orleans still has not been rebuilt. CNN reported recently reported that FEMA gave away supplies meant for victims of Katrina to others, because those that needed the supplies never asked for them. The blame game is still trying to decide who dropped the ball when it came to preparing a major American city for such a situation, both before and after the storm hit.

All we can hope for now is that New Orleans and the Gulf Coast are prepared this time.

Gustav may hit the Gulf Coast by Tuesday. In its path, 78 people died in Cuba and 11 in Jamaica. On Gustav’s trail is Tropical Storm Hanna, which is projected to turn south before hitting the US. Recently, Florida was hit by Fay. Even as I write this, the National Hurricane Center is tracking two more potential storms heading west from the coast of Africa.

This is turning into quite the “hurricane season.”

New Orleans, Katrina, Gustav, Hanna, hurricane, hurricane season, Cuba, Gulf Coast, Jamaica, FEMA, CNN, National Hurricane Center, Africa, tropical storm

Interestingly enough, Tyler Perry’s The Family that Preys was featured on the Samuel L. Jackson site. Ok, I thought, those two are in two new films together. Cool. But when I try to find out what character Jackson is in The Family that Preys, he is not listed as a member of the cast. Hmm.

And then I checked out the cast for Lakeview Terrace, and it is not Cole Hauser in the thriller. Instead it is an actor named Patrick Wilson. I have not heard of him, despite his rather solid indie film and theatre resume. All I can say is that in the trailer’s brief seconds of his face, he can look a lot like Hauser.

Hauser

Wilson

It seems that Jackson has no real connection to the Tyler Perry film, or at least, I cannot find one. Maybe his website, Samuelljackson.com, simply gives shout-outs to his friends, or maybe it is tied to some marketing group that plugs any film with a black actor in it. Who knows, but I do know that Samuel L. Jackson is not in a new film with Cole Hauser. That is too bad, as I think those two may play pretty well off of each other. Another project perhaps.

But, hey, Hauser’s new film is coming out September 12.

Lakeview Terrace, Sam Jackson, Samuel L. Jackson, Cole Hauser, Tyler Perry, The Family that Preys, Patrick Wilson

Wait. Maybe it should be a cousin, because it is a different network.

Ok, today we look back on a K-Ville cousin, Bionic Woman. BW falls into K-Ville category #1 and #2. It was developed to piggyback on the popularity of Heroes, as well, as the penchant for remakes. And it lasted all of eight episodes, not even a respectable season, even on NBC.

At least the ad design was cool.

I for one had high hopes for Bionic Woman. I am a bit too young to remember the original, although I am pretty sure I was alive during the original’s run. Just looked it up and it ran from 1976 to 1979, so I was alive, but just barely. That didn’t sound right, but you know what I mean. I was plenty alive, just barely within the time frame in question. No matter, let’s get back to BW.

Personally, I am a big fan of anything cyborg, but bringing back what I remember being a pretty cheesy show made me nervous for the prospect of a new bionic lass. I know that is not fair as I have no true memory of The Bionic Woman (get it, the original had The attached, the remake did not), but even the little clips I see here and there don’t really do anything for me. And that bionic woman now sells adjustable mattresses on the teevee, so that is not really making me want to go back in time to relive those other, less cheesy moments of The Bionic Woman.
Again, no matter.

Bionic Woman was fairly lame. It started out pretty good, and despite the show’s growing suckiness, I kept watching, and kind of missed it when it went away. I was hoping that Bionic Woman was going to find its voice and get some kickass writing going, add some more fight scenes — a lot more — but alas, it never got better. In fact, it was getting downright silly by the time that eighth and last episode aired. Still, I really wanted it to work out. But then, maybe it was just because I wanted another hour a week during which to watch Starbuck, er, I mean Katee Sackhoff. But her character was a part-timer, and I’d rather wait for her to get better material with more screen time.

K-Ville, Bionic Woman, The Bionic Woman, NBC, Starbuck, Katee Sackhoff

Last season, and mostly due to the Writers’ Strike, we saw some of those lame shows come and go, FOX’s K-Ville being a perfect example. Now, again, K-Ville, once watched, proved to be not nearly as bad as you’d think it would have been, but still, not good enough to escape the FOX programmers and their canceling ways.

One show that I really thought would not make it past a truncated season-ette was and is Lipstick Jungle, but then, just last night I saw an ad for its return this fall.

Lipstick Jungle would have and should have become a “K-Ville”, and for two reasons. The first being that this show is a rip-off of another man-made disaster, Sex and The City, and two, it should have been canceled during that first season. So, Lipstick Jungle falls into K-Ville category #1, and just narrowly makes it out of the #2 category.

I have to point out that I have never actually watched Lipstick Jungle, nor do I ever plan on watching this show. My reasons are fairly straightforward. I hate chick shows, where it is all about women juggling men, work, kids, and still dressing like they are going to be strutting down a catwalk at any moment. Just not my kind of show…

I did read a bit about Lipstick Jungle last season, when it debuted, and this is what I gleaned about the show. Three women, all professionals working in those industries that no one really works in, or at least no one who is as attractive as the older, soon to be obscure (except you, Brooke Shields, but then we have Satan to thank for that, don’t we? ) actresses. But no matter, because the real drama comes from the way that these powerful women have to deal with also having a family and a passionate loving relationship and all those things that we girls are taught to expect from the time we are reading the Disney Princesses books.

Either way, I don’t like that actress Kim Raver anyway, and enough so, that I wouldn’t be able to stomach watching her again, after getting sucked into that season of 24 when she is whiny and helpless for the most part.

Sorry for the rant. I just really don’t know why any show that centers on women has to also center on how a woman is incomplete unless she is in a marriage-like relationship with a man. Subtle sexism, but sexism all the same. I don’t mind having relationships become sub-plots and so forth, but when a woman’s identity depends on the completeness of a couple, it is just lame and totally loses my interest. Kind of like when on Moonlighting, when David and Maddie finally got together, the show became dumb. Romantic relationships are always more interesting when the two people in the relationship are kept apart. Why do romantic comedies always end when the two characters get together? Because once they are together, it’s boring.

Now, true, the flip side of that argument is that it is conflict that is interesting to watch. And yes, relationships can be rife with conflict, and that can be television gold, but in the case of L.J., I just don’t see it happening. Seems too much like committee thinking. And did anyone bother with Cashmere Mafia? No. Why? These shows are too much of SATC wannabes , which is surprising to me as I thought SATC was horrible, trite, and stupid. But those wily tv execs…they never see a vacuum they won’t try to get a marketshare in.

K-Ville, FOX, NBC, Lipstick Jungle, Brooke Shields, Kim Raver, Sex and The City, 24, Moonlighting, SATC, Cashmere Mafia

Freaks and Geeks debuted in 1999, to critical acclaim but no audience. Created by Paul Feig (who works on The Office now), Freaks and Geeks followed two groups of high schoolers, freaks/stoners and geeks/nerds/virgins. The two divergent groups of three or four were bridged by Lindsay (Linda Cardellini), a junior trying to hang with the “cool” kids after years of being a geek. Her little brother and freshman, Sam, is a geek, and his trio represent the “Geeks” side of the show, and doesn’t see why Lindsay would want to hang out with Franco, Rogen and Nick (Jason Segel, also a rising star in Hollywood, both in network sitcoms and films). But Lindsay wants to be a different person, a nonconformist. She dons her dad’s army jacket and suddenly, we have a rebel.

But seriously, Freaks and Geeks was great. I miss it and watch the first and only season every few months. Though I don’t really have to, as many of the actors from Freaks and Geeks have moved on and are working, some in very high profile projects, like Pineapple Express. Franco went on to be the Green Goblin in the Spiderman trilogy, Rogen has taken over Hollywood it seems, Cardellini stole my heart in Grandma’s Boy (see this movie if you haven’t — so funny, better if you are stoned).

The first season of Freaks and Geeks, though considered complete, really wasn’t a complete first season. When Feig found out that FAG was getting the boot from FOX, he and his writing staff put together a season finale, but it didn’t work for me, at all. So in essence, FAG was killed off too soon, and if you listen to the commentary on the DVD set, you will hear that from Feig himself.

Did I mention that Paul Feig is from Michigan (yay, Michiganders!!), and he set FAG (ha ha, I never realized that was the acronym) in Michigan. Judd Apatow was also an Executive Producer, and he is comedy gold, right? Actually, I thought that FAG showed a lot more intelligence than most Apatow projects. More genuine empathy for its characters as they found their place in the complex social structure of an early 1980’s suburban Midwest high school. Think John Hughes without the preciousness.

If you missed Freaks and Geeks, I would highly, highly recommend it. There are truly brilliant scenes and moments, strong and fully realized characters, and Joe Faherty from SCTV plays Lindsay and Sam’s dad.

Pineapple Express, James Franco, Seth Rogen, Freaks and Geeks, Linda Cardellini, Paul Feig, FOX, Spiderman, Grandma’s Boy, Michigan, Judd Apatow, John Hughes, Joe Faherty

Journeyman lasted less than one season, and therefore it falls into K-Ville category #2.

Journeyman followed a reporter for the San Francisco Chronicle, Dan Vassar, who suddenly discovers that he time travels at the worst possible moments. In fact, the whole bad timing issue of Dan’s time travels grew a bit tiresome as the series progressed, especially as only Dan’s long-suffering, not-attractive-at-first-but-kind-of-grows-on-you-after-awhile wife, Katie, knows that he does this little trick. Dan’s brother, and former boyfriend of Katie (ooohhhh), is a SF detective, of course, and after a long time, he figures out what is going on. Oh, yeah, and when Dan goes back in time, he always runs into fellow traveler and long-dead (or so it seemed) love, Olivia, who could never tell him about her own traveling lifestyle until now.

Obviously, Journeyman followed standard one-hour drama protocols, and that is what killed it in the not-so-long run. The first few episodes dealt with the major problem of “gee, I black out and go back in time, and then I wake up back in my own time, but usually in an alley, equally grimey or inappropriate place.” Then of course, the producers/writers figured out that in order to drag out that story into six or seven seasons (as if), they would have to start writing some “stand-alone” episodes where Dan goes back in time to save a kidnapped girl or some lady from being killed or some guy from killing someone. Yeah, pretty weak, but luckily, Journeyman had the awesome Kevin McKidd.

He was Tommy in Trainspotting, so Mr. McKidd will forever be called Tommy in my world. Despite the fact that he rocked HBO’s Rome (best show ever! in terms of political intrigue, sex and general violence — I truly miss it), he will always be Tommy to me. He also did a great job in Topsy Turvy, if anyone saw that.

Moon Bloodgood played Olivia, or ‘Livia as she was also referred to, because you know that extra O is so hard to fit in. She is gorgeous, and I cannot wait to see her in something else soon.

K-Ville rating: Better than, but just barely. No gumbo, though.

Journeyman, NBC, Kevin McKidd, Moon Bloodgood, HBO, Rome, Trainspotting, Topsy Turvy, K-Ville

Then it came to me. There is always an opportunity to watch a “K-Ville.” You know, one of those really crappy shows that is nothing more than a collection of television cliches, but with an added bonus of a fairly recent, true-life event/issue/condition tied into the show in order to add social relevance to the series. There are also the K-Villes out there that don’t last even a full season.

A great example of a one-season wonder...

So then it is not about Watching K-Ville, it is about watching all the K-Villes. Luckily for me, and possibly for you, I just love bad television, and I love criticizing it even more. I mean, I did go to school for it. I have a college degree in this crap, believe it or not.

And I am so glad that I had this epiphany before the new fall season (perhaps the best time of the year!!!) However, I have a penchant for watching old tv, too, so I will probably add some “pre-K-Villes” from time to time.

Now, what I am waiting for…finding a new “K-Ville” with any K-Ville cast member. That is going to happen. I guarantee it.

K-Ville, bad television, Anthony Anderson, Cole Hauser, New Orleans

Here is Anthony (with the most fake smile I have seen in a while — maybe because it looks like they just barely arrived at whatever hotel this picture was taken at (hi, let them get inside)) with co-stars Alana de la Garza and Linus Roache as well as Mr. Wolf. He’s the oldest one in shades because that flash on the camera is just so bright.

TV Week had this little blurb to say…

The Monte Carlo Television Festival will present its Honorary Gold Nymph Award to “Law & Order” creator and executive producer Dick Wolf for his work and leadership in the television industry.

Running June 8-12, the festival, in its 48th year, will feature appearances by some of the most recognized faces from the last year of U.S. TV, including Dana Delany (“Desperate Housewives”), Mark Harmon (“NCIS”) and Chad Michael Murray (“One Tree Hill”). Other shows scheduled to be represented by some of their stars include “Lost,” “Bones,” “Ugly Betty,” “Damages,” “Grey’s Anatomy,” “Pushing Daisies,” “Numb3rs” and both Las Vegas and Miami editions of “CSI.”

By the way, has anyone been tuning in for Law and Order since Anthony has joined the cast? I cannot watch L&O ever since I took a tv writing class with a former L&O writer. One, the teacher drove me crazy, and two, she definitely let us in on how formulaic the show really is, as if I never figured that one out. No, seriously, it is a good, consistent product, and I support the L&O dynasty. I just choose not to watch it.

Law & Order, L&O, Anthony Anderson, Dick Wolf, Alana de la Garza, Linus Roache, Monte Carlo Television Festival, Golden Nymph, TV Week